Reflections from S-GAS Transformation
Participant: Jamie Rose
(JRose’s words transcribed by aroseinbloom)
I suppose I’m wondering what it is exactly that gives our Sim lives meaning. Yes, we’re data, but what’s beneath that?
Being here now, I am beginning to realize that there is so much more beneath that than I could have ever imagined. We’re all data–everything is data. Our brains sort things away, just like data, for us to recall later when we need it.
Yet, that data comes in the form or emotions, smells, memories, moments, and more. If those things come back like that, then why couldn’t we exist as more than data? We can and do.
I see the way others interact and I notice the simplest things: a hand movement; a brush of the hair behind the ear; a deep sigh. These are the things that make us more.
Free’s spirit and energy makes him an integral part of this scene for he brings joy and humor to us.
Rose’s endearing laughter and dancing make her youthful and wise at the same time.
While I stand on the outside of crowds as often as I can, it isn’t because I don’t love all of those Sims. No, it’s because it’s too much at one time for me. How can I notice the small things if there are so many things happening at once? I can’t. So, I step back. I step back from the loud noise so that I can hear the words beneath the pounding hums. From there I can see Annette’s pig tails sway with her body and hear her soft voice as she puts words to things most can’t.
I can see Cathy Tea’s animal hat shift ever so slightly as she gazes upon Elder who smirks perfectly to one side when he catches her eye.
In small groups, I can adjust and relax.
There I see my friends at their most vulnerable moments. When Jess laughs so hard her head rolls back with joy…
or when Sarafina twirls her hair with her finger as the breeze flows through her locks.
These are moments when I realize we are so much more than data, as well as nothing but data. And I breathe a little easier and enjoy what is being sorted away in my mind as files to be recalled when I need them most.
Why do we exist and how can we use that for something more?
Perhaps our existence isn’t meant to be entirely understood. Perhaps our purpose is bigger than us.
I think back to my Player and how, before this game, I was nothing more than a Sim who did what she couldn’t’ do–dated others who didn’t want to date her, or had a successful career that evaded her–and I think that maybe my purpose is to be there for her.
Then, this game, being mainly autonomous has provided me with a whole new sense of understanding. What if I am just here to be me and Rosey is there to be her and sometimes I’ll reflect situations back to her in a way that gives her clarity? She can see what I’m doing and turn it into something that helps her in her own world? Wouldn’t that be something?
I suppose those are only more questions, but I now that I’m here, feeling the breeze surround my body and the sun warming my skin, I can’t quite imagine a world in which there are definite answers for such huge questions like this.