S-GAS Reflections: Ana’s Turn to Dance

Reflections from S-GAS Transformation Session: Chopping/Carrying
Participant: Ana Pringle
(Ana’s words kindly transcribed by Carewren123)

Technician: I think we’re starting to get a picture.

Technician: Yes, ok! We’re on. Live in… 3, 2, 1

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When I first came here I was still a little in shock, you know, from finding out that my whole life has really been a part of a game. And on top of that, finding out that it had been written about and published on a blog for anyone to read. It felt like a personal invasion. And it also felt like my life had been a lie. Not real.

I started feeling better about it all when I starting meeting other people, other Sims, that also have their lives blogged about…

… I guess that’s not exactly an usual thing.

Cathy’s been a big help too. To have a friend I knew from before… it’s comforting.

Also while meeting everyone and attending these sessions I’ve slowly realized that our lives are still real. My player may– okay, definitely–has had some control over it, but my life is still my life.

I wouldn’t change anything about it, because then I wouldn’t have the family that I have. I don’t love my husband or kids any less now that I know the truth.

But even after these realizations started sinking in, simply thinking of my family back home still stirred up some sadness in me. I just couldn’t imagine how to explain it all to them. Maybe I should have had Carewren send them with me to these events…

Ha! I don’t think any of the host players would have appreciated having to juggle ten extra participants.

No. Telling them myself is definitely the way to handle it, but I could never think of the words. That’s when I decided to try writing it down. So I logged onto the computer and typed up an email to my husband.

I never intended to send it, and I didn’t. And I won’t memorize it like a speech or anything, but I can at least picture the conversation now. When I get home I’ll probably say something pretty similar to everything I’m blabbing about right now.

I don’t know exactly how everyone will respond, but I do know we’ll be okay.

Cause I am okay. I came into this event not knowing what to expect. In my first video I spoke a little about discovering who I am besides a mother. I’m happy with what I’ve discovered. It has been nice having a little peace and quiet–and rest–while I’ve been here. But I know motherhood will always be a big part of who I am, but at this point that is a pretty comforting thought. I am a mother. I am a wife. But I’m also a chef, an artist, along with a number of other things. One of which at the moment I think is a bit of a dancing machine! So I think I’ll end it here and let someone else have a turn on the dance floor.

You ready to dance, Lil Nugget?

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