Honey Walker’s journal–don’t read it; return it. Casus Dulces
Week Two, Day Seven – Freshman Year
Editor’s Note: Honey’s journal entries are numbered according to week and day of the week. As she does not keep daily entries, gaps appear in the numbering. Please see the Table of Contents for the full listing of entries.
I got accepted to Windenburg! I found out on our last day of term. Our first year of college is complete, and I’ll be leaving for my new adventure soon.
We decided we’d celebrate the end of freshman year, my acceptance to the year-abroad program, and our last day together with a house party.
Everyone always talks about how college is all about party, party, party, but this was our first one we’d ever thrown!
I spent the whole time just soaking it in–I want to take every feeling with me when I go off to Windenburg, so that even though I’m far away from all my college friends, I’ve still got them with me, in feeling.
Dr. Leslie Dean was so proud.
“All my students made it through their first year! No drop outs, no disasters, no melt downs. We rock!”
She took me off to the side of the main casita and gave me a huge hug.
“I’m so proud of you, Honey,” she said. “You’ve come so far. I knew the moment I first saw you that you have what it takes. You’re gonna make it, Honey, and I’ll be there for your premier.”
Then, when while we were enjoying our meal, Dr. Dean made a toast to all of us.
“You’ve each got your own genius,” she said. “Don’t let anybody tell you any different. Remember what Thelonious Monk says, ‘A genius is the one most like himself.’ So, those of you who will be here for your second year of college, you just do it your way. You know what works. And Honey, when you go out into that big world, you be you.”
I guess I’m still trying to figure out what that means, to be me. But that’s what growing up is all about.
As the party was winding down, Brandon ran up to me.
“You got to check out this video!” he said.
And I had a flashback to our first day here, when Brandon came racing over to show me a questionable video of our dean. We’d grown to love Dr. Dean through the year, so there’s no way we’d even look at any video that didn’t show her in her true best light. But that doesn’t mean we didn’t get a kick out of watching bloopers from the graduation ceremony at the rival university!
I’m going to miss all these guys, I realized while I was cleaning up after the party, and Nathan and Brandon maybe most of all.
It’s hard to think of Casus Dulces continuing without me–there’s so much these guys will learn and go through and discover, and I won’t be here to be part of it.
I tossed and turned when I went to bed that night. I’d be leaving early the next morning, before anyone was awake. I was excited and nervous and sad all at once.
I thought back to what my dad wrote back after I told him and Mom that I’d been accepted to Windenburg:
We learn when we push ourselfs, Honey. Step out of that comfirt zone–thats my girl. Grow and learn and discovr. We’ll be hear when you com back we’ll be here when your gone we’ll always be here. So yu got that rock underneath you. With a rock like that, you can soar.
I slept so well, just like I was sleeping on the rock of love and support that my mom and dad provide. They said they’d come and spend the holidays with me, in the break between semesters. They’ve always wanted to see Windenburg!
And I’ll always remember my first year–my friends and Dr. Dean will always be a part of me. When I return, I’ll be different and they’ll be different, too–but maybe, through my adventures, I’ll be more me! And maybe they’ll be more them. Maybe this is part of our individual transformations into being most like our true selves.
What is it about life that moving towards every new adventure means saying goodbye to homes and people and places we love? I hope I never forget no matter how much I change.