Thirteenth Sim of Thirty Sims at Three Rivers
13. The painting that expressed how she truly felt
Red–the pain slashed through her womb when the door slammed. Leave. Take a piece, leave her behind with a gap where the strongest healing can never reach.
Red. So dark it’s black. A single rose petal lay on top of the armoire, dried black. Touch it. Pick it up for safe-keeping, and it crumbles. Red to black. Crumbles to dust.
Indigo. Blue. She thought the door would open again. He would return. Texts unanswered. Messages spinning through the air. She walks suspended through the days. This pain tethers. How long before she knows the door stays shut for good?
Red to black to blue. Forgotten, while the babies cried and dishes filled the sink and bills came due and the door stayed shut. Blue. To abandon hope. The door stays shut.
That year left its mark deep within. She felt it still, that tear inside, where he ripped her in two. She thought love was in the heart. But it was her womb that ached. It ached for her, and it ached for those two babies. Abandoned. She knew where abandonment was felt, deep in the womb where families are made.
Where families are made, like the parlor where her brother played the guitar. Like the kitchen where her mother baked the casserole. Like the dining room where the children gathered after school with books and jokes and stories and laughter.
Red to black to blue to green. A path stretches back from there to here. Laughter flows from gaps and fills the space with green.
Where homes are made. Where families reside. Her son grabs his cousin in a bear hug.
Her niece sings purple songs, and the sink fills with bubbles that birth rainbows.
Red to black to blue to green. Yellow.
The bills were due and the babies were crying and the dishes piled in the sink and her mother called. “I’m coming. I’m bringing you home.” Hope returned. He was gone, but hope returned.
And now her daughter learns from an aunt how to use her mind, how to be strong, how to grow to be a woman that can’t be torn in two.
And it’s all right. It all worked out.
Red to black to green to blue, and yellow follows through, and the pain, still there, recedes until it’s something new.
Gratitude. Green spills into gratitude. For a mother and a sister. Brother and little cousins. For a daughter and a son. And even for you. Gratitude even for you.
For you live in them, the daughter and the son. And the pain does, too.
Gratitude. You live in them. The daughter and the son. The door slams shut, the womb in two. The pain resides where the family grew. Red to black to green to blue. Gratitude?Look again, on a day that’s new.
Red flows to black flows to green flows to blue. Follow the path to the center, through.
Cousins and a brother. A sister and a mother. These two gifts of babies that look like you.
Red to black to green to blue. A yellow arch in the center, the door to home we walk through.