A reply to: Mathilda Kelly’s Profile
Hi, Mathilda! Are you a real live Goddess, like your profile says? If so, then should I start the letter, “Dearest Most High Royalness?” Or “Oh, Alabaster Heights, hallelujah?”
I’ve never written to a Goddess before.
My mom says she is a Goddess of the kitchen, but she’s joking, because everyone knows her cooking stinks. We usually eat at the vendors.
I hope that you really are a real life Goddess because I want to be a real life hero.
You know, like the Greek heroes. Like Perseus. If I had a Medusa head, I would show it to the bullies. “Hey, Bully! Look over here!” Zap! “What’s wrong? Snake-hair-head got your tongue?”
Do you know how Perseus had Athena? I think it would be awesome to have Mathilda as my Goddess that I served and that was there when I needed help.
Don’t worry! I’m not getting ahead of myself! I know you would need to test me first.
But I am up for it! You can give me three tests, like with Perseus, and I will do them! Then I will be your servant, and you will be my Goddess!
Does it work like that?
But I would need to know how to say your name.
My brother told me it goes like this: Ma-Til-Duh.
But I say it goes like this: Math-Hill-Duh.
I tried shouting it both ways into the sky to see which one sounded right, and it echoed both ways.
I wonder if you could hear me shouting.
Do you know how Perseus had a good heart? That’s why Athena loved him.
I hope I have a good heart. I think maybe I do because I get mad when I see people who are mean to other people, and I try to never be mean, and when I see someone who is being picked on, I always speak up.
But I am a little bit boastful because I read really well, so maybe my heart isn’t as pure as it needs to be if I am going to be a real, true hero.
But I remember that every hero had a fault. So maybe that is my fault. And the Goddesses always help the heroes to overcome their faults, so maybe you will help me to learn to not be so proud.
That would be a good thing because then maybe the kids at school would stop calling me smartypants. Which is a pretty stupid name, if you ask me. How about calling me Smarty Boots? I’d like that because I always wear rain boots. Which is a smart thing to do because sometimes it rains.
What kind of shoes do you like to wear? Athena liked to wear sandals.
Even if you are only the kind of goddess like my mom, the kind who is the kitchen goddess, I would still like to write to you because it is pretty fun, actually.
I hope you will choose me for your pen pal.
Your eternal servant,
Tazer 1541Z (But you can call me Terseus.)